Kirsten DeLeo

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We cannot do this work alone

When you take care of another person, do not try or assume you should be able to do this work alone. Care needs community.

Nature can inspire us with an understanding of care in community.

Late in October, thousands of cranes gather around the wetlands near Sukhavati Spiritual Care Centre. The elegant birds with their long beaks fill the skies, and their cries, like trumpets, can be heard from far away.

In the hundreds and in orderly V formations, they fly over the dark land that is getting ready for the long winter. At sunset, if you catch just the right moment to look up when they fly over your head, it is as if you can touch them and, elated by their presence, majestic and powerful, you feel as if you fly with them.

The old or sick birds fly in the back escorted by two fellow birds on either side so they don’t get lost in the dark.

Isn’t this what we do when caring for a dying friend or loved one? In community and with others’ support, we take care of those who are most vulnerable.

We are all part of intricate and dynamic relationships that make up our lives. During the last months and weeks of someone’s life, these different relationships can turn into circles of care surrounding the dying person, with an inner circle of core supporters and widening circles around them.

 

Adapated from “Present Through The End. A Caring Companion’s Guide for Accompanying The Dying” by Kirsten DeLeo